Interview with Meg Groff

Meg Groff, author of "Not If I Can Help It: A Family Lawyer’s Battles for Justice for Victims of Domestic Violence and the Poor"

Meg Groff's Website

Prior to opening her own law office in 1996, Meg Groff was a family law attorney at the Legal Aid program in Bucks County, Pennsylvania, for 12 years. A recognized authority on issues of child custody and domestic violence, Groff has focused on representing victims of abuse and the poor for more than three decades, handling huge caseloads and winning countless cases.

Groff has been a legal consultant to three domestic violence organizations (two national, one local), and is a fierce advocate for social justice.

She has taught thousands of people—lawyers, other professionals, and laypersons, in groups of all sizes—about domestic violence and family law, and has trained police departments in the dynamics of domestic violence and the proper handling of abuse calls. She assisted in the drafting of crucial amendments to Pennsylvania’s Protection from Abuse Act and to Pennsylvania’s Child Custody Act, and designed and implemented a project in Bucks County that ensures free representation, regardless of income, for all victims of domestic violence seeking Protection Orders.

Since settling in Bucks County in 1984, Groff has been closely affiliated with A Woman’s Place, the county’s battered women’s shelter, and has served on the boards of numerous nonprofit agencies that assist women, children, and/or the indigent. She has received many awards and accolades for her staunch advocacy and pro bono services. Since retiring from trial work a few years ago, she has concentrated on legal consulting, on hands-on mentoring of young attorneys and advocates, and on writing this memoir. Two of her children’s stories have been published in Highlights for Children magazine. A short story about one of her legal cases appeared in the January 2024 edition of After Dinner Conversations.

Meg Groff dedicated forty years of her life to fighting for justice for victims of domestic violence in rural and suburban Pennsylvania. Not If I Can Help It recounts some of the most harrowing, infuriating, yet inspiring stories from Groff’s work as a Legal Aid attorney representing women and children whose only resource is the sheer courage they exhibit every day. Among others, you’ll meet:

Lacey, a penniless single mom whose multimillionaire in-laws sued for custody of her two young sons, only to find their high-priced attorneys outmaneuvered by the blue-jean-wearing Groff;

Annette, who won two hard-fought family court cases with Groff’s help before being savagely murdered by her husband—who then tried to legally force their four children to visit him weekly in prison; and

Muriel, whose estranged husband stalked and threatened her with impunity, until Groff—with the connivance of an understanding judge—devised an imaginative plan for his comeuppance.

Groff took an unconventional path to her legal career. After years as a hippie, subsisting on odd jobs with her carpenter husband, she finished college at age 37 and entered law school driven by a passion for justice. She became an activist attorney, applying innovative tactics no law school can teach to tackle the crises that poor moms and families constantly face, victimized by callous bureaucrats, indifferent police, bigoted judges, and unjust laws. Groff quickly came to admire the tenacity and bravery of the women who dared to stand up to their abusers—and often shared the same risks at the hands of the violent, angry men who held her responsible for their loss of familiar power.

Against the odds, Groff won hundreds of exhilarating courtroom victories—and also suffered some heartbreaking defeats. In Not If I Can Help It, she brings these stories to life with vivid detail, deep empathy, surprising humor, and the boundless passion for justice that has driven her life and work. Readers who care about law, human rights, and the struggles of ordinary people will be captivated and inspired by this powerful book and the sobering insights it offers about the American way of justice.

“Groff’s masterful storytelling skills sculpt profound meaning from even the most terrifying of narratives, gifting readers with a deep understanding of what is needed to protect abuse victims and their children . . . Explosive memoir of a family law attorney’s fight for justice.”—Publishers Weekly BookLife (Editor’s Pick)

“Stories of criminal lawyers are common, but stories of those who do the critical unsung work of poverty law are rarely told. In her humble, witty, and compelling voice, Meg Groff shares the inside story of what it is like to be a family law attorney for Legal Aid, including the fantastic victories and traumatic losses that accompany the specialty of representing victims of domestic violence. This book is a must-read for anyone who wants to know what doing good by being a lawyer looks like.”—Joan S. Meier, NFVLC Professor of Clinical Law and Director of the National Family Violence Law Center at George Washington School of Law

“Not If I Can Help It renews your faith in justice and those who fight tirelessly for it, while also breaking your heart. You come away inspired and outraged, with important insight into the terrifying reality of domestic violence.”—Sasha Drobnick, Appellate Litigation Director, DV LEAP, Network for Victim Recovery of DC

“Everyone who reads this book will want Groff as their attorney-champion, but for now you will have to settle for her being your storyteller.”—Danielle Pollack, co-founder, National Safe Parents Organization and policy manager, National Family Violence Law Center.

Michael Carter, Co-Host

Michael Carter's Website